why must i be the one suffering?
why must i continue to suffer here?
why?
i realli donno wad to do.
you just push me right into a corner,
i don have any chance to escape.
why you can treat others so well and gd?
but just not me.
i realli feel veri pain,
veri pain.
can u understand the pain?
i know you don't understand at all.
i wan to let go,
but i can't.
you tink i enjoy letting you hurt?
i don feel gd at all.
i know you are just waiting for the tree to rot,
our relationship to fall.
you just like others ppl,
waiting for me to fall.
i donno whether i should hate u or wad.
but i just surpress my emotions.
i love you alot but wad about you?

♥ 7:25 PM

feel the pain once again,
why i'm always the one in fault?
why?
what i do,what i said,
is always wrong.
between they and me,
i'm always wrong.
i just said one word,
then i'm showing attitude.
yes,
i'm always the one with the problem.
not others, is just always me.
seriously, i feel veri tired.
so tired that i can't seem to breathe.
i find life meaningless.
nothing goes right,
everything are screwed up.
i feel like crying,
but i can't.
i'm just like a dog,
being so loyal for his return.
when he treats me gd,
i will shake my tail.
but if he forgets about me,
i will just sit there and continue waitng.
perhaps i more like a post it note.
when he need it,
he just take it and use.
but when he don't need it,
he just simple tear it down and throw into the rubbish bin.
i thought,
i could have more times with him.
not a full two days,
he said he find me irritating and annoying.
but with others,
being together for many days are still so fun.
you said i'm so idiotic and annoying.
fine fine fine,
i'm just nothing to you but just a piece of useless thing.

♥ 9:40 PM

i asked you, whether you still love me.
you were in a dilemma.
you said you don't know.
i told you there only yes or no.
so you went to told me no.
my heart shattered.
but i know you were lying.
i know you still love me deeply,
just like how i love you.
till this moment,
i still don believe that we can't be together.
i know we can.
is just how one think.
prove me right that you will be back.
you know,
i will wait.
and i wish you all the best for ur tp exam!
good luck!

♥ 8:22 AM

i hate my present me.
he can just hack care me,
why am i still caring so much.
why am i being so emotional one day and one day.
shouldn't i be veri strong?
seriously,
he wants the freedom,
he wants the glory of a perfect gf.
i'm not up to his standard,
or is the worse of all the girls he know.
why am i such a failure?
why can't i just face the truth?
why must i still act as nth have happen and still stick to him?
why i must let his friends have another chance to "attack" me?
why i must let him to have another chance to hurt me?
i hate that kind of unwanted feelings.
i know what is on his mind,
what he is planning.
i know he will not be back with me.
i know he just pity me.
all of them are just pretending.
pretending to be kind and courteous.
but the more goddness they looks on the outside,
they are double the evil in their inside.
humans are scary isn't it?

♥ 11:45 PM

i start to ask myself whether what i'm doing is right.
i thought,
i'm so strong to face any types of circumstances.
but i never realise,
i'm so wrong.
actually i'm just that weak to face anything.
i thought,
what i do will be right.
but actually,
i'm so~so wrong.
i hate myself for becoming like this.
i was once so strong,
i never let my emotions control my mind.
but now,
i became way too different.
i became so weak,
so useless.
the present me,
always allows my own emotions to control my mind.
i always broke down,
start to run away from problems.
i start to be different in a negative way.

♥ 3:02 PM